Canon Rebate

I am supposed to get back $620 in Canon rebates. And Canon has been very notorious in giving the rebates back to the customers. So, I have been very paranoid and sent in all the materials to canon. I mail everything on wednesday by priority mail (or first class) and have requested a delivery confirmation. Let's see how long it takes for the rebates to come.

5D owner!

I recently bought a Canon EOS 5D, I think I got it on Feb 22nd to be precise. I got a 75-300mm lens with it as well and that's not performing up to my expectations. But the camera is great, with 12.8Mpixels and all those fancy stuff. I hope to seriously take some great pictures and possibly go pro on the side. I have always wanted to be a pro photographer. The definition being one that generates money out of photography. If I can generate enough to buy more and more fancy equipment, that itself would be great. Let's see. There are too many things related to photography. The lens buying experience is one of them. Too many lenses, too many expensive and good ones out there. Too many flash options and too expensive again. I'm trying to get a good external flash, as the camera doesn't come with an internal one. The 580EX is supposed to be a great flash with lots of power. I hope to get it new or used. Then I would need the 50mm f/1.4 EF lens. This lens is really sharp and I love its performance! Lots to learn.

Boring stuff

I don't know if it is just me or everyone else. I think life is generally boring these days. I feel the need to be more creative. I also know that it is somehow possible to be creative in my field. But my interests don't seem to lie there. Or should I take it up as a challenge and go on? There are too many people in the world doing the same thing. I feel the need to be unique, though I am not, in many ways. Most people that I talk to, want to do something great, possibly much sooner than it is practical. I am not different there. Sometimes I think it is easier to just give up and move on in life rather than trying to force things. I also wonder sometimes whether I am good enough for what I aspire to be. That is a doubt that probably many will have. How do you work under such circumstances. I need to reflect on myself more everyday. I have actually progressed at a much faster rate by reading several self improvement books and taking a lot of free courses and self evaluation, personality tests, etc. When people give me suggestions, they don't tell me anything that I don't know.

Also, I feel like I have become a recluse of some sort, having lost some tolerance in dealing with people who can't offer me more insight than I already have. This may sound arrogant, but that is not my intention. I have long struggled with a sense of guilt that I wrap around most of my actions but recently, I have realized that I shouldn't be feeling guilty for what I am. After all, I have not really meant any harm to anybody. I shout and yell occasionally. I feel like I am in a rut. I did a whole lot of research on business schools, other careers, etc. Time is passing by too. I feel like I want to be in many places at the same time. Why does my mind wander like this, I don't know. There is some deep unfulfilled desire, I am sure. It has probably something to do with not contributing enough to the arts. I am interested in music. I have progressed quite a bit since I started playing keyboard. But it is not enough for me somehow. I want to be at a much greater level, but I am not there yet and that kind of demotivates me and puts me on a downward spiral of depression.

I wish to say that I am not usually like this nor do I want to be. I want to be able to create funny sit-coms and so forth. I should lighten up ;)

b'day yesterday

I found out that four other people share the same b'day as me! One of them in fact, has born on the same day as I was and shares the same star! My friends surprised me last night by bringing in cake and some card. that was nice....

The rest of the day went off normally.

Procrastination

I think procrastination leads to a downward spiral of not accomplishing anything. The more you procrasinate, the more you keep thinking about the ones that you've procrastinated and that preoccupies your brain and prevents it from paying attention to other important things, which in turn get delayed. I read this book called Stumbling on Happiness and that says that the brain tends to keep thinking about something that's left unfinished - this can both lead to happiness and sadness. It is upto us to exploit this nature of the brain. It's a great book, BTW.

Me and my ideas

can't believe I've had ideas that other companies have come out with products representing them almost exactly! Firstly, I have had the same cell phone for the last five years (more than five, actually) and I've been looking at all the generations of cell phones without ever getting any interest. Somewhere in the middle, I got an ipod and loved it so much. I have always wanted a device that can combine the ipod and a phone together, with nothing but a display in it, that is touch sensitive. And guess what, Apple has come up with precisely such a thing. I have visited a blog that had all the potential designs of the iphone, based on fans' prediction on how it would look. They all looked great and sweet, but none of them seem to have thought of my idea and much to my disbelief, Apple seems to have made it happen!

The other notable thing - I have always wanted to replicate our house in 3-D model in a software and design the interiors myself and exchange opinions with my family through emails. It has been very difficult to suggest nice interior changes with me living here and my family living in chennai. I come back from my vacation and much to my delight and disbelief, I find this software called "Sketch up" from Google! IT IS A FREE 3-D MODELLING SOFTWARE. Can you believe it? Furthermore, it is just sooo easy to create any 3d design you want using that software. Interior designers have a great tool now.

One more major disappointment - I wanted to shoot a song in just one take, without changing scenes. I really dreamt about this one...but alas, somebody else is doing it before me, in the movie called Auto (Oram Po). I don't know what the hell is happening here.

I've learnt one thing - an idea that's not used today is an idea that's useless tomorrow :)

New Year 2007

I had gone to santa barbara, malibu temple, lake cachuma and solvang on dec 30, 31 with a couple of friends. it was a relaxing trip and we mostly spent time taking pictures and eating unhealthy foods.

My absence

well I was in India from Nov 20th to Dec 16th. That means I left LAX on Nov 18th and reached back on Dec 17th. That was my longest vacation to India/Chennai in quite some time. I wonder why I call it an India trip at all, 'cause frankly I don't know much apart from how Chennai looks. I wanted to go to Bangalore, but that didn't happen. The main mission to accomplish was to prepare for my father's 60th bday celebrations and that went very well. Apart from that we did quite a lot of shopping - mostly clothes for us and the visiting family members and friends. Clothes are expensive. I bought a couple of nice shoes as well. I am back alone 'cause my wife wanted to stay back for some more months. That's about it.

the weekend so far

the weekend will come to an end soon. I had to do many things to prepare for our trip to India soon. I recorded about 28 songs from my keyboard. People back home have been asking me to do so. We watched a couple of movies. Borat is #1 this weekend too! that's amazing. We just came back from a "world of opera" concert held in San Diego Symphony Hall. Didn't know that Irwin Jacobs has pledged to donate $100 million to the Copland Symphony foundation. That's a nice gesture ;)

Got something

got something that's really needed on Nov 7th ;)

Nacho Libre, etc

I watched many movies in the weekend - nacho libre, MI3, Motorcycle Dairies, Borat ;) I liked all of them very much. Borat is definitely one of the funniest movies. It's also easily the grossest one I have seen. You can easily take offense to it and easily laugh too. Nacho Libre was exactly like Napoleon Dynamite, not nearly as funny. I really liked the title music. It was very apt. MI3 was an edge of the seat thriller. Very well done. I really liked Motorcycle Dairies until the 2nd half, where it gets philosophical, etc.

Problems with Air India

AI cancelled the flight from Singapore to Chennai because of bad weather in Chennai. Here's the good part - apparenly, a flight from Chennai is supposed to fly to Singapore first so that it can bring the passengers from there and that's the flight that wasn't able to take off!???? How do you like that?

Parents have left

I dropped them off at LAX last night. After quite a few phone calls that were exchanged between Air India and myself, they finally managed to put them on a singapore airlines flight. Time flies - their visit now seems very short. I am not sure if I managed to please them and make their trip entirely pleasant 'cause I was too busy. I did my best though - couldn't have done any better ;) They will reach India on Friday. Another four weeks or so and we'll be gone too.

Stuff I've been thinking about

My mind knows. It knows that I should stop doing a lot of things I do now. I haven't been able to live the moment for quite some time now. There are all these thoughts. I somehow need to create value with all my talents. I just don't know how. I have been thinking very hard about this questions for a very long time now and I have no answer at all. What my mind says is that I am losing my present with this anxiety, but I am unable to take charge now. My mind says that start on something and the fog will clear from there, but I am somehow not able to proceed with full speed now. I need energy. I have to take charge. How can one create value from interest in music, interest in photography, films and a deep knowledge and appreciation for science? Particularly, what will I do with the professional experience that I have gathered? What do people do in general? Do they just go with the flow, complaining all the time? Or do they just go with the flow happily, hoping for the good stuff to happen whenever it is destined to happen? What do the rest of the men do? Seriously.

Education. It is something I truely value. Be it in any field. It is a process in which you learn quite a bit. The life after education is when you seldom use all of your knowledge. That's the sad part. May be I should have become a professor, but let me not go in that direction. I have this constant urge to learn something. Anytime not spent learning is considered a waste. Anytime that is not spent pursuing your passion is also a big waste. I am tempted to think that this phase will pass. I want to be optimistic. But the clock doesn't wait for anyone. It keeps ticking.

I have a lot of ideas. Tons of them. My nature, call it stupid, tells me that I want to execute all my ideas when my mind knows that one of them itself can take a lifetime to accomplish. Who planted all these ideas in me? Is it so that I'll definitely do something about it? Aren't there any clear people in the world? What do they all do and how did they arrive there? I do see a lot of content people, who don't seem to give a damn about their future. I envy them in one sense. I feel like I have come too far from being like that. My thinking and contemplating mind never stops. It just never stops.

I need to start exercising vigorously again. I have been rather dull. All work and no play makes me a dull boy. I realized that I was quite happy and energetic when I had a strict gym schedule - 3 times a week. It was quite amazing. Amazing to the extent that it was not meant to last. I had this thing going on for four years in a row. I somehow had the motivation, regardless of where I lived, to keep going to the gym and do my one hour thing there. How the hell did that end? I can't possibly explain 'cause I don't know.

I am interested in entrepreneurship. I can't take finance or investment banking. Consulting - may be, but I am getting old for that. I can't put in so many hours per week and see my time being spent away from music, photography. I need those two in my life. Can I take music courses in the undergrad/grad level somewhere? I can already tell you that my mind would want to take photography courses as well. How about film school? Do I stand a chance at all? What am I missing here? Is this the so called mid-life crisis. I really hope not, because I can see things getting far worse.

I thought I would vent the steam out a little. I took a career test from www.livecareer.com. You should take it too. It takes about 20 minutes to answer the 100 questions or so they have on the site, for which there are no right or wrong answers. I know about these tests. You need to be completely honest in order to get a fair evaluation of your interests and your skills, talent, etc. Apparently, I am the most interested in Arts, Science and Writing. The former two I can understand, but I don't know where writing came from. It's a means of being creative...so I guess I can include that. I am also not very assertive or persuasive apparently. I remember earlier I had flunked an entrepreneur test that I found in Guy Kawasaki's website. Don't know where I am headed, to be brutally honest.

The only thing right now that can make me totally happy is a reasonably clear short term future, say 2 years. Education is an option or working hard and learning new things is another. In either of these, I don't see music standing much of a chance. Photography is solely restricted to when I am travelling, but I want to do a lot more. God bless.

Laterz.

Hello....it's september

It's the 9th month this year and I have not idea what all happened. there's just one thing that happened this year - work. I have not been really socializing in the last several months. I have almost forgot how it is to be normal. The more extraordinary I think I want to be, the more abnormal my life is becoming. May be I should just try to be ordinary. I think I have a window of opportunity here that I shouldn't miss. I don't know what exactly the opportunity is. I feel like I should learn more - may be I'll get that if I do an MBA or go to film school. We saw "Vettayadu Vilayadu" in the theatre this weekend and I really liked it. Kamal has given a pretty good subdued performance. The story was good. The best thing was the cinematography! They have really set a standard and it is hard for me to imagine what they would have done to get New York the way they have! Lots of things to learn. I need total peace at this point. Can't go on like this forever. Clock is ticking.

3rd anniversary

of our wedding is today! time has flown so fast that it is difficult to grasp the reality. My parents are here....that's what is special about this anniversary. Otherwise, I would have planned some nice trip or the other. Last year we went to Hawaii and the previous year we had gone to Alaska. But nothing much this year. I guess I will just go around the area here.....

SPQ

This online quiz supposedly tells you whether you can be a good student at B-school or not!

Peter Pan (21-30 SPQ)

Annoyance Level: Medium

You are not quite ready to face the adult world, so school has become your sanctuary. Some might call you a professional student. Perhaps you have collected a few graduate degrees already, or you just wanted to relive your undergraduate days, when you felt life was a party.

Making friends comes easy, and your classmates probably think that you're a lot of fun. But many of them can't afford to go out every night. One of your redeeming qualities is your charisma, but even that can backfire, warns Jon Pinder, associate professor at Wake Forest University.

Robert Hogan, a PhD in psychology and president of Hogan Assessment Systems in Tulsa, Okla., warns that B-school will probably disappoint the Peter Pans. "It's dreary turning in papers," he says. "It's not the world [you] remembered."

If you're willing to get serious and seek direction, you might still be able to get your money's worth at B-school. Putting down the beer and picking up a book would be a good start.

This is what I got out the quiz the second time I took it:

Annoyance Level: Low

You fit in well at B-school and know how to balance work and personal life. You are often the unsung hero of your group projects because you know how to get the best out of your classmates, many of whom are your true friends. B-school is a chance for you to lay the foundation for a career that will make you happy. Even though you had to make sacrifices to go back to school, you wouldn't have it any other way.

Tolerating those who are less laid-back and confident can be a challenge for Ms./Mr. MBA. But you just have to keep in mind that diverse personalities contribute to creating the right class chemistry.

There's always room for improvement even if you are well-liked and getting the most you can out of your B-school experience. You might consider reaching out to a wallflower in your class or a first-year student in need of a mentor. Helping others, after all, will turn Ms./Mr. MBA from average to above average.

8th anniversary

Today (Aug 10th) is my 8th anniversary of setting foot on the U.S. soil! It's equivalent to finishing two B.Techs - 8 years ;) time indeed flies by so fast. I never thought past the year 2000 in my life, but it has been already 6 years since Y2K went by. On Aug 10th 2000, we also had a minor episode on the freeway when going to the bay area - the car in which we were going basically lost control and spun on the freeway before coming to a complete halt on the emergency shoulder!

Parents

arrived yesterday (aug 3rd) safely. They brought tons of stuff with them and we're struggling to accommodate everything in our house ;) Lots of stuff to do this weekend. Laterz.

Happybirthday

a lot of people in madras take this for one term. they ask "is today your happy birthday" and I want to say "yeah, today is my birthday alright, but I don't know if I am happy or not, particularly after you asked this question". you keep hearing "when is your happy birthday".....I don't know whether they really want to know which birthday we are finally going to be happy or if they are indicating that I have not been happy enough on all my other birthdays!